The greatest gift hardship gave me

Something gave me glitter today. I was thinking about how much I've changed over the years. Not just from ten years ago. Not just from five years ago. Even three years ago, I was a different person.

And honestly? I'm glad.

Life has taken me to places I never expected. Some beautiful. Some painful. Some that completely changed the way I see the world. There were times when my husband and I had very little. Times when we felt lost. Times when people looked down on us. Not because they knew us. Not because they understood our story. But simply because they believed they were standing on higher ground.

I won't pretend it didn't hurt.

But looking back now, those moments taught me things I could never have learned any other way. They showed me who genuinely cared. They showed me who only respected people when things were going well. They showed me who saw value in people, and who only saw value in status. 

Most importantly, those moments showed me the strength of my little family. When everything felt heavy, my husband and I had each other. When life became noisy, we still had our bond. When the world felt uncertain, we still had a home built on love, trust, and faith. That was enough to keep us going. The funny thing is, when life is comfortable, everyone seems kind. It is only when life becomes difficult that people reveal who they truly are. And maybe that is one of the greatest gifts hardship gave me.

Clarity. The clarity to see people for who they are. The clarity to stop chasing approval. The clarity to stop putting everyone else's needs before my own. The clarity to understand that not everyone deserves a front-row seat in my life.

Looking back, some of the biggest lessons came from the lowest seasons of my life. At the time, I hated those seasons. Today, I am thankful for them. Not because I enjoyed the pain. Not because I would choose to go through it again. But because those experiences changed me. They strengthened my faith. They strengthened my marriage. And they strengthened me.

And before anyone says it, yes, I know people change. Just like I am not the same person I was ten years ago, five years ago, or even three years ago, they might not be the same person either. Maybe they have grown. Maybe they have learned. Maybe they look back at certain things and see them differently now. And if that's true, then good for them.

Genuinely.

But growth does not erase the past. Growth does not rewrite memories. Growth does not undo the lessons life taught me. I have moved on. But I haven't forgotten. Not because I am holding onto anger. Not because I spend my days replaying old stories. But because some experiences changed me. Some experiences taught me who I could trust. Some experiences taught me who I couldn't. And those lessons deserve to be remembered.

Some people say I'm still young. Maybe I am. Some people say I haven't experienced enough life yet and maybe that's true too. But life is not measured by age alone. Some people live eighty years without learning certain lessons. Others learn them much earlier. Life doesn't hand out experiences equally.

We all walk different roads. What I know is this: I am not the same person I used to be. I think differently. I love differently. I protect my peace differently. I value my time differently.

These days, I choose myself a little more. I choose my peace a little more. I choose the people who choose me. If that makes me selfish, then maybe I am. But it is the kind of selfishness that protects my glitter. The kind that protects my family. The kind that protects the life we worked so hard to build.

Tomorrow is not promised. Today could be our last day on earth. And if life has taught me anything, it is this: Pay attention to the people who stay when you have nothing. Pay attention to the people who stand beside you when life is difficult. Pay attention to the people who love you when there is nothing to gain. Those are the people worth holding onto.

As for the rest, I wish them well.

Truly.

I'm not asking for an apology. I'm not asking for validation. And I'm definitely not carrying it anymore. I have moved on. But I haven't forgotten. I will keep moving forward because I am grateful for the person I am becoming. Not perfect. Not finished. Still learning. Still growing. But definitely not the same person I used to be. And that thought gave me a little glitter today.

Lots of glitter
mageta. ✦ ݁˖

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